Friday, 9 October 2015

A Field in Hampshire (in the Mushroom Season)

showoff juggler sets fire to onlooker jumperOne year I missed the Scout camp because I was abroad. This year I get 2. My Yin and my Yang are balanced, and I cleaned them off in the shower anyway.
So I did a day at school because it's the law, unless you have a whisper in the Elephant with a man about a dog, which is what I've done for the Festival of Christmas. But that's a story for another day.
mcdonalds fratton way portsmouthWe ran home and started. First we parked the car on the pavement right outside and loaded it up. I had to keep closing the car door to let my old schoolfriends go past and it was nice to meet so many familiar faces.
We had made 3 large boxes of wood and many associated burnable things of compressed cardboard because all good boys like to play with fire, and I've been doing it since I was 2 1/2. The car groaned somewhat but didn't collapse.
portsmouth 5th scouts group milton scout campJof phoned to say she was coming home early with a headache caused by my headbutt of 2 days ago and she'd been sent to the hospital by her work boss, and the Scout leader phoned and said can you bring extra tent pegs, or we'll achieve orbit when Hurricane Joaquin passes by.
I have been told to arrive at camp fed up with a hot meal, so against all logic, we walked to MacDougalls for a Chicken McMorsel Greasy Bucket with Chips. Bud does not normally allow this as he prefers to give me food, but this was a special occasion. I had an extra vitamin tablet to compensate.
Walking back home whilst eating hot chips, we met the alleged Jof who stole some of my chips and us chaps had a private bet that she'd spend 2 hours in the hospital waiting room, be seen by 2 different healthcare professionals and be sent home with headache tablets.
portsmouth 5th scouts summer campsiteI showered while he got the tent pegs from the Scout Lock-up and we drove gingerly (well, blondely, with hints of baldness) up the motorway in a very heavy car full of wood talking about Moore's law and space robotics and artificial intelligence and all the usual stuff.
The campsite was just the way I left it last time and included 2 of our old coffins (big boxes you can fit 2 five year-olds in) of wood we left there last time, but Abby (the girl with the big eyes) helped us unload and that's when Bud left and I got collared into putting up tents and that's when the proper Scout camp fun started ... Look at this place, it's so depressing with its mature oak forest and new catering tent and evening sunlight ...
I won the hospital bet, Jof is fine.

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