Carbon-based Orphanism (not euphemism)

I was at school half an hour before it opened, and still I got in! I didn't know you could do that, until ErinsMum told me. I did extra reading with the early birds but in retrospect I failed to catch any worms. I wonder if it's based on Grandad's saying about the early cliff-walker gathering the blackberries?
At school we got a stranger-danger letter about a short bald man trying to get kids to go home with him. I know someone of that description but in his case, it's the kids asking to go home with him.
After school I became a member of the 'Walking Bus' that ferries temporarily orphaned children down the road to Ben's old school for after-school club. Classmate Lewis mentored me and I quickly got the hang of it. I now like jacket potatoes with cheese and cheap ham: I did have supper #2 once I'd got home but who's counting.
The childcare is now provided in a portakabin built by the playground and we ran through the rain to the main building for hot food and I watched Wall-E and I wasn't allowed to swap Match Attax! cards. Given the choice I would go there every day but it's like, £10 a go, and I wouldn't be able to go to guitars, gym, swim, the park, Scouts...
Jof was still at Nanna's so we picked her up from the railway station and I was feeling generous so I gave her 0.75 picoseconds of relaxation time before demanding she play with me.
Thing that gets me, it doesn't matter how many times I say "But I'm not arguing", they don't believe me.