Friday 15 May 2015

Romani Ite Domum

you're doing it wrong gym fail funnyWhat did those roamin' Romans do for us?
Well, lots of things, including building a castle at the coastal swamp now known as Portchester (and Turktown, after the Turkish POWs that were interned there).
I have been to Portchester Castle a few times, including recently by bike, getting in free due to our membership card. This time the whole of Year 4 went at £5 apiece, and we were not the only school to send a learn-quest delegation today, I'm sure the castle guardians were well chuffed about that.
So we arrived by coach and invaded it totally, breaching the castle walls through the front gate. Here are some cool dudes and girlies who enjoyed being in the darkened base of one of the towers until we found out it used to be the garrison privy, and they were standing in the cesspit.
constables tower portchester castle medieval fortificationsCoproliths to you too.
The poor old castle had a chequered history since the Roman settlement, it'd been scheduled for destruction by at least one king and had its tower extended by at least 2 others.
We climbed the keep and discovered that Oakley is scared of heights so next time he's bad, he can jolly well sit on the Naughty Ladder. At lunch we sat on the grass and it had recently been mown so we covered Ines the Portuguese girl in grass clippings (apart from her face) and I dropped my rat on her and she screamed. The rat and a pen shaped like an arrow were from the castle shop, I only had £3 this time so no Mead, Dandelion Wine or Hawthorn Ale for me. The arrows came in handy to battle against Mooie KroonStempels the Dutch girl and Sam with his short sword and we threw weapons at each other just where the armies of yesteryear used to train, nothing changes.
schoolboys selfie gurning idiotsOne of our projects was to sketch the keep from different angles, mine was Anglo-Saxon.
On the coach on the way home we all did selfies for we are supermodels and poked each other in the groins with pen-arrows, what else are boys to do?

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