Tuesday, 31 May 2011

Trying to be a calmer chameleon

unlicensed pharmaceuticals
Had 3 blueberries and a grape for breakfast as I was far too busy waiting to go round to Bens' house today. Bud says I wear the same range of clothes as Baby Edward ie the 2-3 year range, I say eating's for losers, every minute wasted eating is a minute I could be hopping and hooting and jabbering.
Ben was still asleep when we got there on the stroke of 8.
In between playing with all his Star Wars toys and picking at food we went to 3 different parks and saw a film. Greater coverage of this event on Bens' blog. The film "Hop" was about a giant rabbit king and if you touched his throne it made you into a rabbit and the guards shot people with anaesthetic darts. But there was a new swingpark near the cinema (Port Solent not Gunwharf) and we cleared the plain of fuzzywuzzies using a ship-mounted Gatling gun. In the afternoon we went down to normal swingpark with Erin and the JoniBobs and I had to tell on them a lot for throwing woodchips at Bobert and kicking him in the head with shoes on.
Ikea product label and part numberIn the end Bud picked me up just when Ben was on the toilet so couldn't come to the rescue.
When we got back, Bud abandoned me totally in front of the TV (tough life) and hid in my room building the new cupboard of 3 levels. As is the way with Ikea products, there were 16 bits of randomly sized wood with holes, a massive bag of screws and pegs and no instructions. This is a deliberate company policy so that by the time you have assembled, unscrewed and re-created the shelving unit in 17 of 163 million different combinations, you know it inside out and are at one with it on a holistic astral zen-plane of recycled Estonian forest.
railway toys storage facilitySo he had to build my shelf (challenge Anneka at this point) using only the small picture by the barcode on the box itself.
Bud was extremely insistent that I did not come in the room to help, even though I can dance, quarkle and empty the bag of screws down the back of my bed all at the same time. In the end: the strict policy of non-interference worked!
For those of you that have noticed he's built a mirror image of the object in question: he was working in a mirror universe at the time. And you can just turn it round.
My life is so boring, can I have another one? - Tom Gunnel, Editor of Molten Gun Magazine, Mount Glen.

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