So this morning I got up at 8ish and went to see Bud and Jof who feigned being asleep. This didn't last for long and I sang her awake. Jof is currently in Wiltshire on the PuddleMummy holiday so she was not supposed to be here.
Some details have been omitted by my editing team and that's the way it'll have to stay. After an eggy breakfast we piled into the car to take her back to where she should have been. Bud had organised a Pops to keep me company (and to reduce her poor father's duties in his fragile state) and we drove the 1 hour 40 minutes to Centre Parcs to return Jof to her rightful place ie the spa and bar. On the way we played I Spy which is difficult for those of us with a limited vocabulary and spelling skills but we had a good go anyway. I won with "S" for "Solar panel" which nobody got. Jof promised us a trip to Longleat but Bud the Meany reneged on this deal citing excessive cost, said we could go to Paultons Park instead which we both know and love. Having dropped Jof off we travelled the winding roads back to Paultons (possibly at illegal speeds) and approached the ticket booth at about 130 pm.
Some details have been omitted by my editing team and that's the way it'll have to stay. After an eggy breakfast we piled into the car to take her back to where she should have been. Bud had organised a Pops to keep me company (and to reduce her poor father's duties in his fragile state) and we drove the 1 hour 40 minutes to Centre Parcs to return Jof to her rightful place ie the spa and bar. On the way we played I Spy which is difficult for those of us with a limited vocabulary and spelling skills but we had a good go anyway. I won with "S" for "Solar panel" which nobody got. Jof promised us a trip to Longleat but Bud the Meany reneged on this deal citing excessive cost, said we could go to Paultons Park instead which we both know and love. Having dropped Jof off we travelled the winding roads back to Paultons (possibly at illegal speeds) and approached the ticket booth at about 130 pm. 
On the way we played "knock knock" which is where Pops told us the only 2 jokes she knows and I countered with: Knock knock. Who's there? Banana skin. Banana skin who? Banana skin, orange skin; which just shows I don't understand jokes yet (apart from pratfalls) and this went on for a while, Bud would have pulled his hair out but he was driving and he doesn't have any hair anyway. The nice lady at the booth said that'll be £60 please at which point Bud the Super-Meany reneged on his own deal and said I'm not paying that, am I made of money and for 3 hours only. Thus we had spent 3 hours in the back seat of my car for nothing. We hit the pub right outside Paultons for lunch. We played in the garden and found the waterfall for paying guests only and I found some coins for my collection. Later I told Bud that I'd found them on a table which he said was a "Tip" but by then we'd left. We hardly ate any food anyway. Thence back to Tunnel park. Bud felt guilty as he'd dragged us all over southern England and we'd gone on zero rides so he got us an ice cream and put us on the trains 3 times. After much climbing in tunnel swingpark we went back to Pops place while Bud did the weekly shopping in record time at a Sainsburys' that opened till 5.
Gott in Himmel. Well that's not entirely true, I'm right here.
So because Bud failed to deliver the promised theme park visit, he has written Pops a golden ticket to be used sometime in the summer holiday. This time we'll get there before the gates open, get 7 ½ hours inside and go on every ride. It's still going to cost £60.
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