Fear and Loathing in Las Piscinas

School was normal. I was a little tired, but everything was normal, learning Mayan now, more on that tomorrow. Until swimming time. This is when I discovered that all 3 of us had failed to put my swimming bag ready by the front door, or indeed just remember it was Tuesday swimming, so my swimkit languished at home while everybody else had theirs.

In class activities, no soldier is left behind so I had to join the walking-crocodile and traipse all the way to the pool only to sit at the side in the parents-and-old-people viewing area, and watch everybody else have fun. This swimming session is not like my other ones, because there's, like, 30 kids and they all have to take a turn and be watched over, unlike in advanced lessons where there's 6 and we're all capable. So I had the chance to examine, and consider myself better than, many of my classmates.

Then on the way back, it degenerated. Child A said Child B was rubbish and was why they always lose. Which was true, but you can't say. Then Child C had a tussle with Child D and was moved to the back of the crocodile. Then Children E and F tried to move up the crocodile and tripped up so many people they were moved to the back. Then Child G (who likes using the N-word out loud) kicked Child H up the bum which is never a good move because Child H is really big and you don't mess with him and they had to be separated. So in the end, so many people were moved to the rear, we almost went backwards and the last shall become first etc, and half of us are on warnings and next time I'll go swimming, it's quieter.

Instead of running around my local streets (because they're boring) I elected to run just before gymnastics because it's right next to a long sea wall with picturesque walkway where I won my bike medal (no training wheels) 6 years ago. We started strongly but after only 200 yards I went down with the pain of the century which was running after having my afternoon snack. I could only manage 100 or 200 yard bursts before I had to pant to a standstill with a threatened myocardial infarction. Problem was, my legs and lungs were fine, if only I hadn't eaten. I got quite angry about it.

He tried to lighten the mood by pointing out the tyres exposed at low tide, the pretty redhead taking pictures of her dog's bottom and the fact that the dog appeared to be dyed pink but when you're trying to hold onto your peanut butter sandwich and custard, it's all you can think about and then a man carrying his shopping overtook us and I nearly gave up.

But then in actual gymnastics I did a handstand for 28 seconds and managed 2 other things that I've never done before and my teacher says I might go up a group so all this running is in fact worth it.