Faster horses, younger women, older whisky and more money

Dull and rainy day. Pretty well all the snow is gone apart from Icy BM the Snowman: his whisky wilt became terminal overnight and now he's in 2 pieces. Still, CERN eat your heart out, antigraviton particles were first discovered in a suburban garden.

Later I might go down to McDongles and get a really big bag of chips, then go to the gym by KrazyKaves, and sit right outside the enormous windows so the sweating people on their treadmills can watch me eat. Very funny last time I did that, they all gave me the special wave, you know, the one with the middle finger sticking up.This evening it's the Bank Xmas party for all the staff and their kiddies so Bud delivered me there after doing some Xmas shopping. I went downstairs to see the safe/vault when they were putting all the money away, it was very funny and the door is as big as a house! No photos are available of this event because they don't want burglars to see that they keep the key under the mat. They promised to lock me in if I was bad. I showed everyone how to attack the pinata (remains brought home for the bonfire) and distributed the party poppers. This is the ninth Santa I've seen today. Either he's really busy or something funny is going on..........

Saturday night is bath fizzer night as usual so today we listened to Brownsville Station's self-titled debut album. This deleted record contains the best song in the world - the 7 minute "The Martian Boogie" which I shall try to post on here somehow. Bathtime finished at ten past 10 which was just in time to see the kid with the pet good death robot bust the woman out of the mad hospital and shoot the bad death robot in the face. Then Bud turned it off saying he didn't want me to have bad dreams considering Scooby Doo gave me night terrors last week but I think he was being silly and protested loudly all the way up the stairs, it looked like a really funny film to me.