Thursday, 26 January 2017

Objects in Mirror are Stupider than they Appear

chinese villager uses grenade to crack open walnuts for 25 yearsWell, it's really starting to heat up in the Red and Yellow Card area. We now have 4 Reds in our class (not under the bed) and other classes have their contenders. Again, the usual suspects are the ones attracting the attention.
But now we have a new source of cards: some might say reminiscent of the strategically placed 'Cash Cow' road speed cameras. Our new pencil cases have a plethora of stringent rules surrounding their use, contents and storage. You can't touch anybody else's case, lose an item, add an unlicensed interloper, steal an item to replace one you lost, or sharpen your pencil too enthusiastically, thereby shortening its allotted lifespan. We have weekly inventory inspections. I can say, however, that they are all labelled with the splendid labels Bud brought home from his last work, making him an accessory.
We are approaching the mock mock maths exams: soon we will be doing the SATs and are preparing to sit a practise exam, for which we are getting practise. I have the 3rd best grade-point average, and that's not a post-truth alternative fact, it's all there on the averages.
And apropos of nothing, we all have intestinal gas that we must rid ourselves of, some more weaponized than others. Others may choose to release a series of little gaseous anomalies in the hope of evading detection, but I prefer to discharge a single methane maelstrom, preferably when sitting on Jof, poor girl.

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