Sunday, 30 November 2014

Guerilla Gardening

105 mm shell 4.5 inch naval shell casingsI was a perfectly behaved child this morning because when I finally woke up, I started reading instead of making noise etc.
I had breakfast in the supermarket again but the whole place was heaving and I had a 20 minute wait for my food so Jof bought me 2 more books, easy money. We are decorating the brass cannon shells but you can't get baubles big enough for the massive ones so Jof said let's put festive twigs in them, Bud was quite scathing about this idea but it turned out to be quite good so we bought 3 sprigs of twigs and now we no longer have ordinary ordnance.
2 years ago, I collected conkers, as every good boy does. This time, instead of trying to plant them out on the common (which didn't work last time), we selected only the very largest and planted them in big pots in the back yard. This is completely unsustainable because they get big quickly and we planted far too many and all the other conkers we threw in the bottom of the pots for compost sprouted anyway and we had about 70 trees. Even the Xmas nuts from last year that we planted just for fun came up and we had half a dozen nut trees taller than me and that was after only 1 year.
So we knew they had to be planted out, for every sapling is sacred, and we know a song about that, don't we, children. So he said let's go and plant them on the common opposite Bens' house and I said can I play with Ben and Jof sorted it and all I had to do was walk across the road after planting out the trees and it would all work out.
On the way we discussed what pattern to plant them in, for it is an opportunity to be naughty little boys.
guerilla gardening on milton common  moorings way portsmouthAn X would be quite easy to do. A circle would be more difficult, the ground is uneven and you'd be unlikely to meet up with the trees you planted earlier. An M would be better, but ditto for difficulty. But the obvious one was a willy. After a few decades, the willy made of horse chestnut trees would be visible from space, depending on how often Google Earth update their imagery. But we opted for a simple straight line, and he dug and I installed the baby trees and we moved across the face of the earth leaving a trail of trees marching across the landscape. At one point we met a boggy area and brambles so we simply turned left and left another line of trees marching away into the distance. Maybe most of them will get eaten by foxes or trampled by wildebeest but at least we tried.
Then Robert jogged past us and I went to Bens' house and set off the singing Darth Vader lots and found the plastic microphone and sang merry songs of madness to each other for ages.

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