Tuesday, 31 May 2016

Bugger Canyon (Bognor Regis not included)

Today was a day with Jof, often easier than one with Bud. We had to go into town to pay in all that lovely loot from the school fayre and that's one thing about the gradual takeover by robots, they may be replacing us in the workplace but they sure don't complain when you pay in £200 in loose change. Grandad is worried that by the time I reach working age, robots will be so ubiquitous that unemployment will be the norm, so I should find myself an occupation that won't be done by an automated AI. So that's me sorted then, a thespian gardener with a sideline in blood and, er, tissue donation.
shoot em up first person shooter gamerAnyhoo, there we were in town so lunch at Marks and Spencer was a given, and then I used my stagecraft talents to sow the seeds of an idea in her mind about buying me the new Star Wars Battlefront X-box game that Best Bud Ben has, then I gave of some of my lifeblood, well, extracted some from the stone that is Jof, and I was a winner once more.
This game is totally brill. It's got lots of different theatres of war, you can be a first-person shooter in a starbase, you can fly X-wings in Beggar Canyon or the ice fields of Hoth, and I found the best place to hide in the jungle to kill Stormtroopers when they come out of their steel Sally-port die die rebel scum and the graphics are outta this world, those are some serious pixels, baby. It was lots better when Bud turned the volume on for me and all the time there are angry seagull noises and people going "Red Leader! Enemy fighters approaching your position!"
Jof even joined in and crashed repeatedly into the giant walking-dogs where lasers come out of their mouths and I laughed a lot but what a groovy mummy I have that plays X-box Join the Imperial Overlords and hopefully Ben and I can agree a joining-time and have a Wookiee shoot-'em-up party and OK I have a bit of a habit of using the DD-RR-RR-RR gun and lasering off the heads of my allies but that's just 'cos I'm epic.

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