Friday, 11 March 2016

The Time Interfrastic

grossly obese americans fail walmartiansLast night my brand new scooter was bought from me by a man sent by Mr Ebay. It was just too big for me even though I am powered by the Dark Side, a tragedy from which I'll never recover (until the next packet of Pokémon cards).
And we also sold some tents for the Scouts, I look forward to sleeping out under the stars.
boy on giant scooterToday in school we found out that we are at last going to sail our boats on Canoe Lake next week, only about 4 months after we made them. We have to attach safety ropes to haul them back if they fail to progress but mine is designed to sail over the hills and far away, not remain tethered to a park bench like some kind of mindless beast.
psycho juice hot chilli pepper sauceSpeaking of which, Woo-Boy (mentally incompetent neighbour whose only word is Woo, when not banging his spoon on the radiators) was in our front garden today, making a bid for freedom.
Also we took delivery of my new ketchup which will go on all of my food except the ice cream, honest. Dave's Gourmet Insanity sauce is an old favourite, and Psycho Juice is the new pretender. I like their motto (printed on the bottle) which is "Matris Futuor Canis Filius" which is a valiant attempt at Latin. If you translate it directly (and assume that Futuor is a naughty word, even if it's made-up), you get Mother-Lover Dog of a Son. Close enough.
Tonight I was very grumpy-tired. You know when you have a bawling baby or terrible toddler and the elder knowledge-holders gather round and say "well, he's just over-tired", I was that sheep ...

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