Monday, 28 December 2015

Pokémoney and the Sprout Bomber

man falls off ladder cutting tree branches funny failI think they've got to the point in the extended holiday period when they've just got tired of the endless timeless days and yearn for structured agendas again. I was woken up at 1030 and told to actually eat breakfast instead of heading straight for the Minecraft computer.
So Jof wanted to take clothes back to M&S (I think they're a clothes-buying service, but you can get food there as well, very confusing) so we tagged along and I bought 5 packs of Pokémon cards with my Pokémoney.
Traditionally, British people buy inedible miniature cabbages called "Brussels Sprouts" at Xmas time, serve them up with the turkey and then hide them in the leftovers and assume that the vitamins have somehow leached out of these bitter cellulose bombs into the surrounding food, so you don't have to actually eat them.
Thus, we had a bagful of unused, uncooked and unwanted sprouts so we took them with us to feed to the animals in Victoria Park.
These caged beasties are probably fed by the park staff but have a never-ending supply of cabbages and carrots from well-meaning schoolchildren.
animals in cages victoria park portsmouth
Thus the rabbits are so terminally obese that they can hardly move and if they ever require food, they just roll over by the fence and some enterprising child will insert a carrot with minimal difficulty to the rabbit in question.
So we shoved some sprouts through the mesh. It's just the right size so if you shove your sprout parson's nose first, the last 2 pairs of leaves will open up and wedge the sprout in the mesh so the intended rabbit can nibble away in prime photography pose.
As usual, the rabbits did not even wake up, let alone heave their bulky bodies towards us. But the guinea pigs waddled over purposefully and appeared to enjoy them so we stuck a few in at pig-level and shoved the rest through from 4 foot up, trying to bomb them from above with some notable successes. Our evil work done and our bag empty, we had to wait for only 45 minutes before Jof got out of the huge queues in the shops and met us. It is my last day of being 9. Later I played the X-Box motorbike racing game that Jof got me but however hard you wang the joystick to the side, you just drive onto the grass and crash so I went back to Minecraft.

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