Monday, 6 January 2014

The Problem with Ninjas...

annoying kid at bedtime funny cartoonLast summer when we moved house, we used the giant downstairs shower because we hadn't built the bathroom at that point.
Last night we had to put some more of that dratted shower sealant around the edge of the bath so used the old fossilized downstairs one again - one day only, while the gunge dried. Now I want to use it full-time - it's so much bigger, with refreshing jets of hot water at ground-floor pressures - but the whole room needs a rebuild.
Next project then....
'Twas our first day back. I was glad to have homework to hand in but I forgot the pile of football cards for Ben.
Our new maths teacher rocks, even though we miss Miss Jackson.
I took in all my duplicate Horrendous Henries and the class voted for extra reading because they liked Henries so much.
The park was still full of lakes and my new scooter is brill. Somewhere I read that if you're a scooting expert, you can get 3 miles on just 30 kicks. Perhaps they are teenage kicks, my legs aren't big enough.
So, I said, I want to make a Ninja mask. Then I can wear it while scooting around the playground and everyone will say, who is that dashing masked man on the chariot of fire? But Ninja masks are notoriously difficult to make, because of copyright infringement. Ah, says he, your child-like concept of a Ninja mask is rather similar to a Balaclava. I bet I can write that off as a legitimate business expense because only yesterday we were on the seafront getting our ears blown off by gales.
So we tried Millets the outdoor pursuits outlet and they said I know we had some, but they seem to be gone. So we tried the big motorcycle shop by the big church but it was gone. Ditto the other shop on the same Road and by the station. Even LIDL did not have one in their Challenging Seasonal Goods area, although it did have lots of figure-hugging skiing leotards. It seems whenever you want to find a Ninja, they're all invisible, Macavity the Mystery Balaclava.
We gave up and got one online, shipping post haste from New York, of all places.

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