Monday, 20 January 2014


breast agency engrish menu item funny fail'Cholesterol'
I used to eat Beef Jerky
But now I've gone Cold Turkey
(c) Professor Mungleton 2014
This afternoon I went to reading class with the Year 6 pupils. I'm not sure whether they're in remedial classes, I'm in super-advanced class, or something else.
gap toothed boy
Gap-Toothed Gargoyle
Still, I did my bit for my own income by losing yet another tooth: I therefore have a double-width gap, the day before the silver screen beckons.
After a bit of Lego castle-building, I got on Google Maps to plan my next bike ride, and asked to print it out. How was I to know I'd centred the map on a delightful country road south-west of Berne, Switzerland? It all looked so nice.
At last Ben and I have broken through the Beaver Dam that was holding us back. Our first full session as Cub Scouts was working towards our Creativity badge and we had to design, build, and operate a machine from scrap parts supplied: the aim was to propel an egg 10 metres without cracking.
We had to wear latex gloves, like a group of underage proctologists. What is the group term for proctologists anyway? A ring? A pile?
scout meeting in church hall milton 5th portsmouthOf the 4 teams, 2 were successful and I was not on a winning team. One lot built a bow and arrow: another created a ramp but were disqualified for not building a machine: yet another made a propeller and we did a catapult. When we activated it, my fellow team members were not paying attention so didn't hold it down for stability: the terrible trebuchet did a forwards flip and shot the egg into the ceiling.
Fortunately the eggs we were using were half a dozen rubber eggs from Jof's work (some kind of advert for savings plans - nest eggs) that we lent them, so nobody got yolked. Cubs is bigger, better, harder, later. Our discipline is much improved with proper saluting and Sergeant-Major shouting of orders. Resistance is futile! (And measured in Ohms...)
When I got home, it was as if the entire house had been dusted, hoovered and tidied, as if we had important visitors coming.

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