Tuesday, 27 December 2011

Life as a Faun-again Pagan

husband and wife lung slice funny engrish menucleaning out the conservatoryUp for 10 as usual. This holiday will never end and the days of going to school are over.
We needed to do a bit of tidying up before Nanna arrives tomorrow so started by separating off the cardboard for burning and the bottles for banking. This is when you get distracted by the Housework Randomizer Theory (see details here ) and we ended up emptying the conservatory, washing the walls, golf balls, plastics recycling bin, hoovering etc etc. All this so that Nanna cannot see the domestic squalor of our daily existence.
Due to wetness and soapitude, had to get dressed again only an hour after managing it for the first time.
alloy neodymium magnet sculpture disc drive hi tesla actuator parkAs he was so lucky at Monopoly last night, Bud bought some lottery tickets with the £5 note and the 2 x £2 coins he found last week. He said I can have a share of any winnings but with reductio ad absurdum, dipso facto and habeas porpoise (inter alia) I'll owe him 27 quid pro quo and 50 pee.
Later there was lego - I did actual lego, he did magnetlego with his micro-magnets.
When Jof got back from sales-plundering, I knew exactly what I wanted to do, thanks very much, and I'd already set out all the money and the playing pieces and the cards. It started with the usual purchasing frenzy, I turned down Park Lane this time, and gradually amassed all the stations (this is something JofsDad always went on about) and within meedle of no time had even learned the finer points of the game
  1. Take peoples' money in a polite fashion. Always remember to say "Thanks for the £200, Mr Baldy, ha ha"
  2. Watch the movements of your opponents carefully. And then say "Yah hah, Poo-brain, enjoy Stupid Tax, Mr Stupid"
  3. Tell your opponents what you think of them by slowly lifting one buttock and emitting a long, drawn-out squeaker while pulling a mischievous face. Then quietly place another house on Piccaddilly (£850) while they're not looking
  4. When people are scrabbling to get change together to pay you rent, hold out one unwashed hand right under their noses while cackling and saying "Hurry up, gimme money, where's my money".
Of course I have also worked out that reality is outside GameSpace so I'm untouchable IRL.

No comments:

Post a comment

Hi! I'm glad you want to comment, for I like messages from humans. But if you're a Robot spam program, Google will put you in the spam folder for me to laugh at later.