King of the Road

Ah, Saturdays. Always a good opportunity to play Minecraft. And I did, for a while, but then we had to go out at my own insistence to have a haircut. I have been increasingly hirsute recently - not long shaggy girly locks like Stanley - but with nights away coming up with school and Scouts, short hair is an administrative dream with minimal shampooing and drying time.

So I went to the usual place and ordered my usual Grade 2 Tennis Ball, and the hairdresser looked at Bud for confirmation and he said he's been choosing his own hair for 5 years now, go for it.

Then we waited ages for Sydney to come round for a lift to acting but she didn't show and we drove off anyway and then I was one of only 3 students at acting because of the holidays. We all have vocal or breathing exercises, one girl has to hiss for 30 seconds on one breath but I have to go eeeeeeoooooo from high to low and also speak with 3 fingers in my mouth to stop me speaking through my nose, apparently. Reminds me of a joke I'm sure I didn't hear about Y2KY Jelly allowing you to insert 4 digits instead of the usual 2.

Met Mr VaderVader again in the theatre, he strangled me 3 years ago so I tried to nick his light sabre. The drama teacher was the body-double for Ewan McGregor in Star Wars 3 so we spoke about Arnie and my autograph collection for a bit.

A few short days ago I went cycling with Sydney and her wheels were much bigger than mine and I fell off 4 times which was because my bike lost control. So the answer was to buy a new bike with better self-control. I've had this one for 2 years and only now did I realise it was far too small, so once we'd had a mixed lunch of numerous reduced sandwiches from Little Tesco, we took it back to the shop to complain.

The nice man totally understood and was kind enough to give me £50 for the old faulty bike, once I'd bought a bigger, better, new one. He took one down off the rack and Holy Poodles it was ace and brill and flash and big and has 18 gears and wheels as big as the ones on Bud's bike and you can lift it up with one hand (well, he can) and the deal was done.

While we waited for them to tighten all the nobs etc we nipped over the road to the Caveat Emporium and looked at the skulls and stuffed foxes and nudie paintings and 15 cm Imperial German railway gun shell being used as a gong and we bought a constellation globe in blue which is also a moneybox. Jof knew the boss as well and he still had some information in her handwriting which was mildly eerie until she remembered.

Then came the inaugural bike ride to the seafront. It's a very fast piece of cake to ride, you hardly have to push at all and I didn't fall off once but it's quite tall and squashes the old canticles a bit if you put both feet down at once. We zipped up and down the seafront a bit and I can't wait to show it off to Ben and we saw one of her Britannic Majesty's Iron Fists lying off Portsmouth Harbour quietly blending in with the mist and I think I'm going to enjoy biking again.

♫♪Trailer for sale or rent, rooms to let, 50 cents. I'm a man of means by no means, King of the Road ♫♪....