Sunday, 21 July 2013

Storm in a D-cup, boom boom

In an attempt to return to normality and routine following the upheaval that is moving house, Jof went supermarket shopping while I cleared up Lego. Of course this only means I can get it all out again onto a clear floor, which happened later. We did do a brief foray into the park for some shirtless swinging and bottlebanking and I fell off my scooter again but the real ambition of the day was to swim out onto the old wartime boom, as promised yesterday.
It was quite busy at the seafront for some reason but we managed to find a clear square yard between all the bikinis and strode into the water with purpose, and steel-toecapped work boots, in his case.
Of course swimming in the sea is different but the good bit about this task was that you can take it in little bite-sized hops and have a breather between each hop. Many many youths were attempting the same thing, although none were as young as me.
Plenty of them were in fact girls, and the boys showed off to them and threw seaweed at them and they all jumped in from the concrete blocks. One surfaced right in front of me minus her bikini top, which was nice.
We pressed on. A group of boys were on the same block as us and one pulled a large edible crab out of a crevice but then he said he'd seen larger and threw it back. Eventually we made it out to block # 10, which is by the green pole. That was when the nice lifeguards came along in their motor launch and said we couldn't go any further, because the next hop (double width) was the through-way for boats and we might get clonked. To add gravitas to this order, a speedboat called Hyperactive zoomed through the gap and it was immediately obvious that we would have been killed.
Each block was covered in seaweed and sponges and mussels and barnacles and everyone got cut but the salt water cleansed the wounds. Thought #1: good that there are no sharks here. Thought #2: isn't the sewage outflow just around the corner?
Gradually we made it back but I got tired and had to have a bit of help. Then we noticed that Sam of my class was next to us so we played catch and mud-pie attack. We can see that Block #10 is only a little way out, we have to buy a boat to get further. The Solent was as busy as the beach, I could see loads of yachts and container ships and jetskis and canoes, 3 cruise liners set off for sunnier climes and 3 warships lay silently off Ryde.
Later I played Jof at Totopoly, which is a game about horses. All of Jof's horses died and I laughed so much I got hiccups again.

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