Saturday, 7 April 2012

The invention of the CHOCTOPUS

cardboard box castle for children with police lightsToday is a sandwich day, not because we ate a lot of sandwiches, but because it's a quiet day sandwiched in between 2 complicated ones. After the Puddle Sports Day with so much hard work done in the marquee afterwards, we needed a bit of time off to consider things. So I chose to go to Sainsbury's with Jof rather than go to the charity shop and buy a 20p car.
cadburys chocolate fingers and easter eggsOnce I'd got back there was a surprise waiting for me up the road, so I went and collected her. Pops has just got back from Egypt where they had a really good time. It was very burning hot and full of sand and camels and they went to the Pyramids and the Sphinx. She has brought back a lovely suntan which makes her look even better. I slyly inviegled her into Box 7 and we played jumping on the padded floor. We shut all the curtains and doors and put a blanket over Box 7 so it was very dark indeed and nobody could see what we were getting up to, then asked for some of those candle-like LED lights so we could see, and pretended it was Halloween. We watched "Arthur Christmas" until her meanie old parents retrieved her.
cadbury chocolate fingers and melted chocolate15 or so years ago, Bud invented the choctopus. It was a little doodle and describing-note in the margin of a greater work, like Leonardo's parachute. However it was not until today that it came to life, to be handed out at the pub tomorrow.


First, obtain your raw materials. You will require: Cadbury's chocolate fingers, smallish easter eggs and melted chocolate.
Arrange fingers in a star shape, 8 each.



homemade chocolate surprise for children

2. Pour a blob of melted chocolate right into the middle to glue the fingers together.
Melt a little bit off the pointy end bit of the cheapo easter eggs and stick it onto the melted chocolate.




 3.  Once all your choctopi are built, it is time to consider decoration.


invention of the choctopus chocolate octopus
4.  You are not a professional chocolatier or even a day-release prisoner with an ONC in Confectionery so avoid the temptation to overdo it: your skills are limited.
However, these are for kids so make sure you overdo it. Hint: hairstyles are very important to Octopi and they are always very happy, with faces bordering on the insane.
8 legged chocolate surprise for the kids

5. Here I have added fluting to the arms and a nose rendered in glittery icing.
The results are very silly.

Don't make yours a mean marine mollusc, make him a silly cephalopod.






Jof has taken pity on my lack of skill and has done some backup ones in case mine fail abjectly. Perhaps they are in fact chocolate starfish.
chocolate desserts gone wrong


At the top: well-known spaceship invader owned by Lurrrr, Ruler of planet Omicron Persei 8.
Further down: head lice, also known as "Nits".
ship of lurr ruler of planet omicron persei 8


human head louse under microscopeLater in the evening I was so eager to show Jof something I had done with the PopsFantastic, I stubbed my little toe something chronic and with Claret abounding, I had to forego Bath Fizzer Night (and even a quick shower) and hit the sack gently.
Ben. Get your little bottie back here quicktime to pubfest Easter egg hunt.

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