Saturday, 31 August 2013

Naked Planespotting: Bums and Bombers

fort cumberland sea wall eastney portsmouthHurrah for Saturday, although boo for being the last weekend of the holidays.
We did do the bottlebank walk after some initial objections to having to move off the sofa, I bought 6 toy cars and a pair of trousers, as you do. After that, we hadn't got anything on the list at all so we fitted a doorbell and looked up the tide tables.
The selected website confidently predicted low tide was about 37 minutes away so we hurriedly got our stuff together and Jof dropped us at the nudist beach. This may seem a non sequitur of classic fruitloopery but we were there to attack the waterfall with the new army spade, as promised. BTW, we got a parking ticket for being in the road opposite our house (1 hour only). If you pay a pony quickly you don't have to pay £50, where are we going to get an equine quadruped at this time of night, FFS.
swimming in the sea off eastney hayling island in backgroundThe army spade unfolds from its own carry-pouch and has a serrated edge and wide flat bit and is just the right length for someone of my height. I never looked back. We loosened and removed blocks, bricks, rocks, big bits of metal and other detritus from the sump under Fort Cumberland until we just couldn't reach any more. This is when we discovered that the website in question lied like a cheap watch, as the tide was coming in rapidly. We abandoned ship and suddenly I really had to have a poo.
There was no toilet nearby apart from the sea. So I removed my clothes and ahem yes well anyway. I guess if you're going to remove your clothes then a nudist beach is a decent place to be indecent.
anti-tank concrete blocks on landing beachOur civil engineering job done, and my jobbie done, I swam naked the 300 yards back to the section of beach that wasn't just populated by elderly queens and both of us played happily in the surf in birthday suits (and hats).
That was when the one remaining airworthy Avro Lancaster Bomber flew slowly over us on the way to the Bournemouth airshow, possibly to mark the 70th anniversary of the Dambusters raid. You have to salute these guys for they saved our botties in the war, and many botties were grateful and indeed, on show. However that did mean that the only picture we got was somewhat after the event. Then sadly our time ran out and Jof picked us up for an afternoon of doing not much.
I have a new Lego project but it may take some time to complete. It requires music. But then he introduced me to well-known board game "Risk" while Jof was napping. Obviously, I woke her up and I got to bed at 11pm, having made up several new 4-letter words (they are a required part of Risk) such as 'Splut', 'Plunt' 'Krum' and 'Plart'. Exact number of letters is unimportant, they are a measure of quite how aggrieved you are when Jof takes Egypt from you. While I still need training on how many dice to throw, I have got right into it and now hold Africa and Asia, pending restocking.

1 comment:

  1. That was a lovely Saturday, so warm and sunny


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