The Day of Fail

Saturday. Up at normal time but he wasn't, something to do with a bad batch of Vino Collapso last night. Breakfast Fail.

I played Lego Heroes with Jof and he emerged, cringing, and swapped doors with the stripping shop and took back 7 boxes of kitchen tiles (£269), returns win.

On the bottlebank walk we helped lots of little people climb the climbing rocks in Swingpark and I scored 1 and 1/2 Lego Bionicles in the charity shop and a giant sausage roll in the butchers, which is pretty well all I need, journey win. Jof took me to Southsea and spent a mere £30 on a Lego Police truck with added Baddie in getaway car with gold ingot: it did make me happy but took less than an hour to build, parenting win, and yet even so, Childcare Fail.

During this time, he painted.

Then Jof went for Girlietime. The idea was, eyebrow makeover and spraytan, in preparation for a night on the town with the twins from work. She was double booked, but did get the tan, in which she stood naked in a tent while someone hosed her down with brown stuff: decorum fail. She then stood like a Jesus drying off while other people came to look at her: privacy fail. Then they said well actually you can't have a shower for 9 hours or the eyebrow thing so please go home and stain your clothing pointlessly with the brown stuff, laundry fail.

We went round to see Pops, she was out, which is her thing, GF fail. Further painting. Tried again, got a Pops, hooray! We played dogs and cats, hide and seek, annoy the Jof and many other household favourites. Jof left, paint pot ran out. Took Pops home, she didn't take off her pink raincoat the whole time, must be losing my touch, Valentino Fail.

Tonight was supposed to be the inaugural bath fizzer night for the new house, now that the bathroom is mostly finished not including the oil-based paint on the woodwork that takes a mere 16 hours to dry, reading the instructions fail. But that was royally scuppered when the boiler died. The builders had put on a radiator with the screw thing bent so it dripped and the system lost pressure. The boiler tried to light 5 times and failed, so went into extended sulk mode and wouldn't play unless we called out an emergency plumber at 9pm on a Saturday night. They were all unavailable, 24 hour callout fail. Bath fail, shower fail, washing up fail, possible plasterwork and ceiling fail where the radiator will leak for eternity, goodness me, this is fun.

Jof came home at 10pm (Nightclub Fail) and played with the boiler for a bit, no luck, cold shower for him. Countersunk willy fail.