Super-size my raincoat

The weatherguessers have dissected the holy sparrow and determined that it shall rain and storm. Might go to the seafront to shout at the sea.
The Picosecond I was picked up from school, the abuse started. Was there anything particular about us all he could see? Anything about what we were wearing? Yes, everyone except me was in party clothes. In fact another 10 pupils throughout the 200-odd strong school had equally lazy and incompetent parents and came in in uniform. I suffered the slings and arrows of outrageous bleedin' six-year-olds all day 'cos of this cock-up on the clothing front, some pretty barbed taunts, I can tell you.
With the seafront plan in mind, we started searching for fancy dress components for the Puddle New Year's Eve party. We leapt from charity shop to charity shop, eventually finding exactly the right kind of outdated headwear in the last one. Dropped in on Jof to get a hug, and drove into town where we braved the wrath of the potential roving traffic wardenettes to run into U-Need-Us to get something for my costume. He says I should wear a Policewoman's uniform and go as a bent copper, oho, but his words are as of the desert wind to me, dry and old with a hint of mosquito.
By the time we'd made it back down to the seafront, it was predictably dark and the expected promenade road closure had not taken effect, so we couldn't even get a picture of that.
To add insulting-salt into the previously sustained wound, the Lego Bionicle I sneakily bought in the Oxfam shop turned out to contain only 2 helmets, half a leg and 6 instruction manuals. I was not going to get far with that. Maybe I'll go to Ikea and get myself an abandoned monkey.