Right from the word go they were cleaning and Jof was fretting. We tidied and tidied and generally pretended that nobody lived here. Then the Estate Agent phoned and said that out of all of the people that were coming to inspect our house with a chance of one of them wanting to buy it, all but one had decided to go Xmas shopping instead. So we have repainted and hoovered for weeks and I've not been able to get my Lego out for days and all for one person. What a bag of poo.
We took the walkie talkies to the park and deliberately avoided each other for half an hour while the single inspectors were at our house but then it rained on us so we went home. Poppy was out on a sleepover so I couldn't even play. It's all rather sad.
I like cowboys and alien hunters and zombie killers and secret agents and guns and swords and cannons and bombs and planes or helicopters with machine guns and spitfires and armies and shooting at tins of cat food and putting fireworks in the bonfire and pretending they're sea mines. But I'm glad I don't live in America where any mildly affronted youth can buy a bunch of assault rifles and blow a million bullet holes through a kiddie school.
Today we are scheduled to bonfire a load of Blind Uncle Len's old paperwork. When Jof has confidential waste at her work, she puts it in a sack and sends it off to a special comapny that shreds it. But we use our industrial inferno. Puddlers will know that the rules of firing state that at least 1 strange item must be burnt. Today we are burning Newport Passport Office, Wales. Len and his wife won't be needing passports any more.
In the afternoon I spent £3 in the arcardes at Clarence Pier and we were going to have a walk on the beach, throw some rocks etc but it started raining heavily so we thought stuff it, actually, and came home. Delivered some stuff to Ben and the JBs were there, didn't invite me, humph. We have been tasked with picking up some of Jof's work friends from the Hoverport for their night out on the town. They are twin girlies which made Bud strangely excited. He made me one of those placards that chauffeurs hold up at airports in the name of Rumpy and Pumpy, I think it's nice that they have names like that. The placard worked a treat and the 2 happy girlies approached me smiling, which is exactly how I like it.
I made them feel at home and was very attentive, the good old fashioned lover boy. Then Thin Stacey and Kat arrived and I provided drinks, polite conversation and dancing. We started the bonfire and the girlies said goodbye and as they left for the pub, the twins gave me a £2 tip! Straight into the Lego fund there. Bud said they're now friends with benefits, sounds splendid. 
They were on a sleepover!
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