One of my favourite programmes at the moment is Winter Wipeout / Total Wipeout in which various contestants attempt to cross devious obstacle courses while wearing giant safety suits. Mostly they get muddy or fall into the swimming pool or tumble gracelessly off a precarious yet brightly coloured podium. Jof would be rubbish at it, even though she can swim. But I'd be good if only I was a few feet taller, ditto Bud. So I pestered him to apply, which he did. Sadly, they are no longer making this programme so aren't looking for new contestants.
Straight away, it all went wrong. Today is my school trip to Beaulieu: they've known about it for ages and had to pay fees and everything. So there I am, the only one in school uniform, without the prescribed rucksack and stuff, because they got distracted and forgot. I know I'll always be a little bit unique, but nobody likes to be the odd one out. I told off Jof loudly. And will I be warm enough? Oh, look. It's snowing.
We had a really good time and saw James Bond's crocodile submarine and the BlueBird and loads of other fancy cars. One boy got his head slammed in a door and on the way back, a girl was showing us how fast she could headbang like JoniBobsMum and she clanged the wall of the bus. When we got back I growled and hit Bud repeatedly for the ignominy of being in school uniform all day. We delivered paperwork to the solicitor which was boring. Then we did a drive-by dumping of a carful of stuff to the charity shop, which was fun. We ran in and out with armfuls of bags (and one bedside lamp) which is a defence against the staff realising the quality of the donations and refusing to take more. We emptied stuff out of the loft for Jof to pack and we got down the big flat artworks that were too big for the coffins. We invented specialist packaging for them. At Beavers Ben was there again and we spent the whole hour attached to each other. Leader codename 'Bluebird' said we were magnetic but really it was Emotional Velcro.
One of my favourite programmes at the moment is Winter Wipeout / Total Wipeout in which various contestants attempt to cross devious obstacle courses while wearing giant safety suits. Mostly they get muddy or fall into the swimming pool or tumble gracelessly off a precarious yet brightly coloured podium. Jof would be rubbish at it, even though she can swim. But I'd be good if only I was a few feet taller, ditto Bud. So I pestered him to apply, which he did. Sadly, they are no longer making this programme so aren't looking for new contestants.
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