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In the last Scouts of the term we welcomed a new member and cooked sausage-inna-bun on an open gas fire in the church garden.
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Tuesday was one of those days when your voluntary activities come back to bite you in the butt. Syd and I have a Drama School Showcase performance tomorrow so tonight, once I'd barely had any Minecraft at all, I had to go out for a 4-hour rehearsal.
It is my destiny, and I do have talent, and it's all worth it. But sometimes it's hard work. Bud has a Scout Group executive meeting tonight, same applies.
One Man, Two Plays
Wednesday was a day of great news! I was told that tomorrow, it will be a full 6-hour day of Lion King dress rehearsals. But first I had to hold down the lead role in our section of the theatre school showcase, a for-parents production in which they see where their money goes and what little Tarquin and Rosettina get up to when they're in stage school.
It is the enduring fault of my schoolteachers that am at drama school, and I thank them for it. I made myself a snack and then walked to Little Tesco to buy myself the food I most associate with acting - tuna and cucumber sandwiches.
Sydney arrived dead on time and we drove past a million students celebrating graduation day to the theatre, where we'd been asked to come in 30 minutes early to rehearse our pivotal sketch, the second half closer.
Plenty of LSD, colour and tassels in this one, then I came on to introduce a song from Showboat and it was half-time! While we weren't onstage, Syd and I helped the Little People get to their stage cues on time, quietly.
In the second riposte the Younglings sang D'Oh! Re Mi and lots of girls in suspenders performed Money from Cabaret which woke everybody up.
OK, so we made a few mistakes and had to ad lib a bit and missed out a section but the imaginary flaming crepe suzette was good as was the real fire extinguisher used to put it out. But Thin Laura has only been with us a short while and was great, Sydney did some quick costume changes and I got a few laughs.
At the end, to cover for a forgotten line I ad-libbed a speech to the audience in which I said I hoped they'd enjoyed the show as much as we had enjoyed putting it on. Outside the stage door I got plaudits and congratulations from strangers and I was annoyed that I'd made mistakes but happy that I'd now only got 1 play to concentrate on. I was wired, incandescent with energy. And tumescent, didn't expect that.
Late to bed last night and still fizzing mentally so was quite tired today. Once we'd done boring pointless stuff like reading, we tested the sound system for tomorrow's performance and basically had ourselves a disco!
We kept the beat going from break to lunch and so the whole school got to join in. Then we got into our costumes and rehearsed madly for a while. On the way home I met Jack W who was at my Tiny School and will be with me once more at Big School.
So, there I was (in pants) being REALLY angry about a Minecraft mission when Bud said let's go out, things to do, places to go. Thing is, the Mine-task was to get past the pavement of holes to the bridge of safety and drop the clock of insanity into the lava (hope you're following this).
And it was mildly embarrassing when the man came to read the meter and I was only in pants, but then we drove (fully clothed) to the Scout Storage Garage and took out the empty gas bottles and signed the asbestos inspection register and got out all the plastic barrels for raft-building that we never use. I have a size advantage (that I am slowly losing) so was able to climb right to the back of the packed shed, even though I fell into a camping toilet.
These are the things you have to do when you work for the Scouts. Meanwhile, Jof's car was covered in so much guano, she had to pressure-hose it twice before her car felt able to park next to all the other, smarter cars.
Friday at last, and one I've been especially looking forward to, at the end of a bizarrely busy week. We donned our costumery and did a performance of Disney's (remember this for later) The Lion King for the rest of the school and staff, which went down a storm because we're awesome. In fact, I remember last year when I was but a stripling in Year 5, the big, mature Year 6s did a talent-show type sketch revue and I thought they were the bees' knees, now it was our turn to sear the memories of talent onto the younger generation.
And we had an extra-long lunch break again, because let's face it, we're practically retired. The end of the day dribbled into being and the teachers set up the stage and sound system and delineated the audience area with millions of those little football cones, and we waited for the parents to arrive. One of mine was first into the playground and obtained Prime Seat #1, for photography purposes.
It is a little unfair to review without pictures, but: the Rafikis were resplendent in their finery and makeup. The Poomba/Timon duo are destined for marriage, although Jessie (Timon) is the talented one. Ingrid (Zazu) will go far, with or without her unmanageable hair.
The wind played a big role in the production, erecting the tassels and ribbons of the Rafikis, animating a discarded crisp packet that made repeat unscheduled appearances, and going wumph wumph on the radio microphones.
I (Mufasa) had a loud voice and obvious stage training as did Stanley (Scar). He was pretty good, and could hold a tune. I made sure my dying roar reverberated a bit and then Owen the Destroyer took over from Harvey the Haircut as my son, and the world continued to spin once the hyenas had eaten Scar. I have some REALLY good pictures and videos of the performance but cannot use them here. At home I cursed the 2 lines I forgot and had a soak in a foam bath, for it has been a tough week.
RainShine Roulette
Because of the tough week, I was most miffed when he said we're going out. I was very miffed indeed when he said we're cycling, because I could see it was raining. I wanted a day of videos and chocolate, not wetness and torture. He said we'll play 'Rainshine Roulette' and hope we get away with it. I wore the special face of sulk, the one I can keep on all day if required.
Anyway, it cleared up a bit and we rode uphill against a 75 mile an hour wind to the Gosport Ferry where we bought the tickets with added bikes, and the man onboard said there's a special rate on for the summer - bikes go free. It is best to only tell people that once they've purchased their tickets from the machine.
Arriving at the Explosion Museum, I cheered up as I was surrounded by guns'n'ammo, although the rebel flag was not on the wall. Amazingly, I can still fit in the depth charge thrower, and a jacket potato with tuna and sweetcorn could still fit in my tummy. And nowadays I actually listen to the videos of ex-servicemen explaining how to fire a 5 1/4 inch gun.
In the shop I got [chocolate and] a T-shirt saying "I love Explosions" which Bud said I had to wear on the plane next time we go on holiday. So on that subject, I chose some Jasper Conran swimming trunks in Debenhams, and he swapped them for 3 Sports Direct ones for the same price. And then I got my sit-down time.
Saturday-night-is-Film-Night was Lethal Weapon 2 in which a man is decapitated by a surfboard. I liked the condom tree and the nailgun to the head and all the chocolate.
Pete Fountain's Half/Fast Walking Club*
After being forced outside against my will yesterday, I insisted on a day off, which in my book means one in which the wearing of pants is not guaranteed, let alone going-out type clothing.
But during the Minecraft Marathon I did ask to have a walk round the park so Jof and I fed leftover bread products to the birds while he fed leftover glass products to the bottlebank and clothing-banked some of my school uniform, for the End of Days is close at hand. Maybe one day in the future, some random African village will have an outbreak of maroon jumpers.
And I did do a bit of work in the swingpark for old time's sake but then, amazingly, it started raining, as if it hadn't done enough of that yesterday. We did a half-fast nonchalant walk back home, and I plugged in again, for I can never get Mining Fatigue. And apart from a couple of games of Uno, that's where I stayed.
*Jazz-playing marching Krewe at the New Orleans Mardi Gras. Originally the Half-Arsed Walking Club, the Parade organizers asked them to change it.
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